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How to be lighter and brighter than sunshine!

To be light. To be light. Is the ultimate goal. To be light is the ultimate goal for you. For every one of you.

Here’s how we recommend to be light! And childlike!

Understand your emotions

There are emotions connected to your thoughts and feelings And the negative ones must go! it is no longe appropriate to carry them around. To carry them around is draining to your energy. it holds you back from your fullest expression.

You came to earth and you think you are of the earth. You are not. We are telling you you are not of the earth.

It is time to have some fun. Some fun with your life.

Here’s how to lighten up…….

2. any thing that is not love, joy, bliss, laughter, humor, love is of the earth. it is time to release those emotions. Some of these emotions may include anxiety for many of you. Anxiety. Anxiety. Is not of the heart. Anxiety needs to be released if you have it. Worry. Worry is not of the heart. Anger is tricky. It is not of the heart, yet holds great energy to catapult change. please release the anger.

Authors Note: Situations cannot make you angry. You are angry because of what you feel inside!

Lighten up. Please lighten up your energy. There is way. Please continue to read…..

Here is How to Lighten Up

Look inside of yourself. Feel what needs to change. And work to change it. It is that simple. Become aware that a change needs to be made. Meditate on the light that shines in each of you. Meditate for 15 minutes per day. And you will change.

It is time!

What Does It Mean To Attract Better Things Into My Life?

This question has always puzzled me.

I just could never quite grasp the law of attraction. And I feel that it needs a new name because it seems so religious that I can’t connect to it, really.

A few months ago after I just learned that Brett was not interested the way I was. And that he did not like me the way I liked him. I was crushed. The woman told me a story to reveal some insight that I should extract from it…..

Things are changing in the world. Check out this creative cover Lizzo did for Rolling Stone.

A Shift in Energy Can Attract

Naturally I was only half-listening because I was too distracted by my feelings of despair at the loss of Brett.

The story began when she attended a wedding in China, her friend was getting married. I gauged this was not a super regular occurance for her, so don’t tune me out already.

The dress code for the wedding was black, and she was wearing a red dress! So she stuck out like a sore thumb.

I felt that I had essentially heard a story like this before….but I kept listening.

Back at the wedding she already decided she was having a bad time before it began! But instead she made up a fake name, saying she was Brenda Starr working for the Toronto Starr. And that exchange made her laugh! She laugh and because of that expression she raised her vibration and shifted out of a negative state of mind.

Then, she said, “Two people zoomed up to me and asked me how I was doing, and I had a great time!”

But, how does that relate to me?

I know what you’re thinking. How does this relate to me (you) or even me (me!).

I have tried countless times to shift my energy to no avail. Actually if I was in a situation like that…the situation would probably just stay the same after I giggled!

But the truth that I found is that I can shift my energy and physically feel sensations of attraction.

It’s happening now for me, because I’m ready. Everyone is ready at certain times.

And to determine the state of readiness are two things:

  1. How much mental, physical, emotional and spiritual work you’ve been doing
  2. Where you are on the path in relation to your life purpose

When you have become more self-aware, opened up spiritually, released some major traumas and sense more, and meditate then you will notice the sacredness of life. How everything is a well-orchestrated dance. Everyone is playing their part!

The physical sensation of energy is buzzy. It is what attracts people to want to act differently toward you. They react to the feeling that you put out. Because it affects them positively.

You might notice that every day no one sits near you at a local coffee shop. Yet, when you shift into feeling this divine energy and connectedness from a higher level of consciousness…and Angels……

That’s when people suddenly want to sit next to you.

Eating Clean and Feeling More Patient

In an effort to help me clear my channel to my higher self, hear my guides/Angels more, and heal more when I go to The Rose Cottage in 3 weeks, I have taken to eating only vegetables, fruit, and plant-based protein.

That means I’ve cut out sugar, most dairy, meat and caffeine.


Bye bye Sugar. I used to eat a Trader Joe’s package of peanut butter cups daily. Having a coke was a regular occurrence for me. This week has been particularly hard because my body is craving sweets and sugar.

I was able to counteract this for a few days with a Stevia-based coke alternative, and fruit. Going through this type of withdrawal is the hardest because my body is calling out for a sweet-fix indulgence. It is like quenching a thirst for sugar.

Overall, I do feel more patient in general. And I feel a bit flushed in my cheeks. I feel prettier too when I just eat clean.

I guess what they say is right. Sugar really is a drug. And you have to go through a withdrawal period.

When I see Elizabeth Rose who is a trance channel, hypnotist, who Angels step through to channel their message, I want to be able to go really deep into any self-sabotaging behaviors I have, when I am regressed by her. Some of these self-sabotaging behaviors may even come from lifetimes before this one. And the cool part about it is that you can see and experience these traumas when they come up, when in a regressed state.

I’m curious as to what I will find out! But mostly, I just want to communicate with The Angels….

I would not recommend letting anyone use hypnosis on you. However Elizabeth Rose is highly trained, and was recommended to me by a TRUSTED friend. I’ve already had one healing session via Skype with her, so I know she is the real deal.

Why I Need to Heal More

I am apt for more healing because there are so many energies from the past that I hold onto. And it is making my energy still to heavy. The goal of this time is to become light enough to go into a higher level of consciousness. Which is feeling super positive even when it is rainy or sunny outside. It is the outer context of life that is affected when we go into the higher levels.

There are tons of emotions within us. Just look at how you feel when you see a strikingly pretty girl. Awkward and maybe jealous?

Just see how you feel when someone brings up a point that makes you feel less than. Muted and shut down anyone?

These are all energies within us. From memories and experiences. We aren’t even conscious of where all of these memories are from.

We only operate with about 5% of our conscious mind. Imagine how much we are forgetting!

One thing I know is true. And that is we must become light, light, light!

So, no sugar for me right now. It’s been hard but rewarding. I feel brighter and nicer.

Industrial Age Trauma

I read an article that said during the Industrial Age sugar was used to pacify irritated factory workers. Are we just pacifying our emotions right now with sugar? If yes, then it is time to put sugar down and look inside to what you are trying to run from.

Tonight I’m having plant-based tacos! Just like Kim K said in her Instagram! 😉

Are Angels Real?

I wanted to steer very clear away from the spiritual route on my blog. There is just generally something “uncool” and “not millennial” about talking about Jesus.

What Are Angels?

Angels are etherial beings that are guardians of God. They are messengers and are not only huge in being, but very powerful. They are also very bright and kind, but definitely not pushovers… so don’t even try it.

Meditation and Light

The Angels have a message for everyone, and that is it’s time to trust yourself. It’s time to see who you really are. It’s time to feel the new energy that comes to everyone. It’s time to see everyone clearly, starting with you.

How Do You Do This?

Well you can start with meditation. But the most important thing is to transform your negative emotions into positive ones only. Only then will you be able to see the true nature of yourself!

Again, I can’t believe I am going down the spiritual route here. But I will try to make it cool….. 🙂

Do you believe in Angels?

Tired of believing in people’s projections

One thing that  I wanted to cover more is the concept of projection. It is very easy to believe the message that other people are telling you. When infact, what thye are telling you is nothing more than a projection of their own issues. I read something one time that said “you are not a projection screen”. And it can be really hard to tell when people are projecting especially if what they say is related to one of your issues or triggers. For example I had someone the other day tell me they like how I’m assertive “sometimes”. Normally, you might take this as a compliment. And I did. But the “sometimes” part threw me off. I started to question whether I relly am assertive as I think I am. But I got a hold of myself, and the part of me that I’ve worked on that knows myself inside, what I’m feeling, who I am, what I am capable of and is learning to trust that part, took a hold of me and said “wait a minute girl, you are going to believe him? He’s not only 8 years younger than you, you’ve experienced more, you know more why are you lettinghim mess with you like this. You know you are assertive and you know his issues and this sounds like he is really projecting onto you. And yu are buying it!” So, I had to agree with my rationl self. I was buying loads of stock in this. And I took a step back and realized that he just projectile vomited his fears and worries and shortcomings about himself onto me. And I am believe this mess.

Themes of a week

The themes of this week are existential pain, being your real self takes time, digging in to difficult situations.

Difficult Situations

I have to face yet another difficult situation this week as someone has gossiped about me and I have to meet with the manager and the employee tomorrow. It’s hard to face these kind of situations but standing in my personal power and setting boundaries and not backing down from them is what is needed. To really dig into any situation and get dirty in the mud. That is how I can stand my ground. It is the only way I can truly live and shine. Not run away from conflict or doubt my self or what I sensed and saw and felt in my heart.

Existential Pain

I realized that even though I healed myself through my childhood issues that there is still feelings of emptiness, worthlessness that I need to heal. Sometimes I want to talk to people to fill up this well. But nothing, neither money, stuff, or interactions can make me feel as good as when I am connected to myself and speak from that place. I know from my dreams that I need to heal issues around my masculine energy that would go back to my childhood and my dad’s influence. There was nothing traumatic that happened in my childhood with my dad. So I’d be really interested to find out what is lingering in my subconscious that is still wounding me. Once it is healed I will enjoy the benefits of even more happiness, attracting better people into my life, and loving myself more.

Being your real self takes time

I feel the pressure because I am 30 years old to be my full self. But there are so many internal systems going on inside of me. That it does take time to look inside to feel full. After the first healing that I did it brought me to a place where I can enjoy life and feel more embedded in the patchwork of life, if that makes sense. Suddenly I don’t feel so alone anymore. I feel like I can actually have fun. Move forward in my life. Experience life instead of just using my brain to think through it.

Art Credit: Claudia Tremblay

Self-Partnered and Inner Bonding


I recently heard the term self-partnering from Emma Watson, and it sounded similar to the influence of The Mother Wound that I was reading about from Bethany Webster.

A strange thing happened that I noticed. After I healed my mothering issues, I also learned that there is something dented about my male energy, which would come from my dad. Although he was always at work, I had a few dreams that indicated there is some unconscious pain there. I feel the uncomfortableness inside of me that I had been living with and I wasn’t aware of before.

Anyway, with my female side and energy freed up I was being very much like my childhood self.

Not only that, memories long forgotten made themselves visible to me again. Resulting in nostalgia. One was when I was about 8 years old. A fiery child. I had a guy friend named Michael who was around 12. I found a cloth snake (definitely seemed 80s.) In my garage and I remember whipping it around. Well, I got a little too excited and whipped Michael with the snake! It gave him kind of a burn. The next thing I rmember was the overwhelming experience of doing something wrong. Because Michael couldn’t stop crying. He ran home. This is for some reason a fond memory. Because it is a reminder that I am a very strong individual who can” beat the boys.” But really, it’s not about beating the boys. It is about empowering everyone. I want to be inclusive so I have to make sure I don’t excude guys as well. 

Anyway, I found the book Inner Bonding: Becoming the Loving Adult to Your Inner Child, and I have seen positive results by reading the first couple chapters.

The premise is that we have an inner child inside of us, that needs things, attention, love, but as the adult most of us become disconnected from our inner child and from our feelings. This disconnection builds up and then negative consequences happen in our lives because we don’t know how to take care of each other.

I healed my mother issues. But my room is still amess. I had no desire to clean it up. I am working like a mad woman. And I didn’t know how to stop and to have fun. Fun seems like a progression backwards. I just didn’t know how to do these things, and was frenetic that because I had learned this behavior from my parents, that I would miss out on the good things that life has to offer. I also still felt a sense of loneliness and a desre for companionship. 

But I tried to talk to my inner Gab, to see how she was feeling. I have seen other people say this but it seemed a little immature to me to be honest. However I imagined little me, and it was quite easy and effortless. In that moment I knew exactly what I needed, I need rest. I need love. And as an adult I am able to affirm Little Gab that I love her. And it really does decrease the neediness that I feel. I feel much more partnered with myself. So Emma Watson’s definition really does make sense. 

Feeling scared on owning my power- thoughts. 

I used to be scared about owning my power. But I see that fear is irrational.. earlier this week when I first started freely speaking I was scared. I was met with resistance and I thought I was going to get fired.  Reclaim. My power.  But now I see there is even more power for me to reclaim. And I can’t wait to emerge as my full self. If I offend someone with my words it is not my fault. I see that the more I reclaim my own power, by first healing the wound, then taking empowered actions, using my voice, being heard, volunteering for leadership positions, the more powerful I become. An important part is nurturing my inner child when she feels scared about the territory we are going in, worried that other people don’t think she is pretty, or generally just needs to be nutured. It is so important to love my inner child. It really soothes myself and makes all the difference. 

Green Light

I finally got the green light that no one can regress me back to my former wounded self. I have healed my wounds as far as they can go from my mother. And the result is spectacular. I didn’t realize how small I was behaving. How much MORE of myself that I could be, how much fuller I could be. How I was behaving before is pathetic. It is like a watered down version of my real self. My real self is powerful. I had grown men respecting me fully. One even said that I was a very strong women. And I enjoyed it. I enjoyed teaching them how to respect me. For the firs ttime in my life I could see myself becommming a manager, no longer would I be passed over because ei was too nice. No I love myself, my cup is fully, and that is truly the key to being an expanded and full being. There is much more that I need to climb up to reach my potential, and I need to do it all quickly, I want to be a young leader. And so I feel te pressue. I don’t want to be like those older women who hate on the younger women because they feel like they never got to live. I must live my fullest being now. I must unshackle myself completely, I wonder how much more alive I can truly feel. It is an exciting time to be awoman. To b a human.

Verbal boundaries confuse me

The ideal of boundaries confuse me. I think too much about what I am supposed to say. And what I am supposed to be like. That most of the time it seems like I am just trying to be dominant. Or I think I am not supposed to say “Thank you very much” because it seems to passive and I need to be “the big man in charge.” It is really a confusing world of boundaries that I am perplexed by. But mostly it is the question of what to say and when. And what is appropriate social roles for a gal in the 21st century. So many things are up for grabs and the future is being written in the present. It is all very liquid.

But one thing is for certain. The energy of our culture does not sustain the male dominated values it once did. People notice more and more when a girl is dismissed. Or particularly when I am dismissed or when a guy is trying to mansplain something. Before my personal learning journey I would try to “be the man” and out man the man. Now I am more tuned into my feminine side. Where I know leadership exists. You can’t fight a man by being a man, that is what I learned. I can win the conversation by being a woman, by being myself. The culture does not tolerate totally male patterns nowadays. I have seen success by listening, by being open, by not trying to be the top dog, but rather to be myself, to own myself. That is the golden key to escaping the bondage and traps of each other.

After the 2nd crying/releasing session of the day.

Words flooding my memory from my subconscious

“Aren’t I special too”

“Why didn’t you love me?”

Flashes of memories, childhood pictures, photographs all flooding my mind. There is no need to force any action as my body holds the pain and knows what to do. All I need to do is allow. Allow the pain (which isn’t as bad as you’d think) but there is a lot of it, to flow from my subconscious to my conscious and out through my tears. The result is worthwhile. It is a lighter, brighter, calmer version of myself.

I am starting to understand the we really are like magnets. And what is inside of our minds really does have pushing and puling power. We are really here are Earth to heal ourselves and it is true that every situation we are in will teach us something. This insight has me looking at life a little bit more through a spiritual glass.  Today I allowed myself to truly grieve over a childhood trauma of never feeling special and always being compared with mycousin. I was surprised that I didn’t need to fore anything. The pain and emotion are already there in my subconscious. The only thing that I had to do was allow. And yes, it is terrifying to go into this kind of pain. And when you allow, the feelings wash over you. And they take oer. Your thoughts become automatic. The words you here are innocent. While I was reexpericing my emotions of this trauma all I heard was “aren’t I special to mommy?” “aren’t I special?”. The little girl inside of me was still saying this to this day. And right now I gave her a voice, and grieved over this trauma. It was well worth the effort because I felt a sense of peace and serenity flow through my body. And  wash outward to everyone I encountered. Previous days I always felt alone but after grieving I felt a sense of belonging and love. More people reached out to me by text message, and I got a second job. It is no coincidence that we are tranmitters. Like radio channels. And it is worth it for me to increase my frequency.More to come