The ideal of boundaries confuse me. I think too much about what I am supposed to say. And what I am supposed to be like. That most of the time it seems like I am just trying to be dominant. Or I think I am not supposed to say “Thank you very much” because it seems to passive and I need to be “the big man in charge.” It is really a confusing world of boundaries that I am perplexed by. But mostly it is the question of what to say and when. And what is appropriate social roles for a gal in the 21st century. So many things are up for grabs and the future is being written in the present. It is all very liquid.
But one thing is for certain. The energy of our culture does not sustain the male dominated values it once did. People notice more and more when a girl is dismissed. Or particularly when I am dismissed or when a guy is trying to mansplain something. Before my personal learning journey I would try to “be the man” and out man the man. Now I am more tuned into my feminine side. Where I know leadership exists. You can’t fight a man by being a man, that is what I learned. I can win the conversation by being a woman, by being myself. The culture does not tolerate totally male patterns nowadays. I have seen success by listening, by being open, by not trying to be the top dog, but rather to be myself, to own myself. That is the golden key to escaping the bondage and traps of each other.