My intimacy in the age of technology

Love yourself. Love yourself. How to love yourself in the age of technology. How to care for yourself. How to let yourself shine. A funny thing happened today. A boy that I once flirted with moved out of his house. I probably will never get to speak to him again. And again I felt the knife in my heart of comparison. I felt lonely. Lonely because he probably had intimate and close relationships and probably doesn’t want one with me. My thoughts raced am I even worthy of intimate relationships? Now I knew where this was coming from. Clearly this issue stems back from my mother. And how I was conditioned. I know that it is not truly me. But I stumbled onto something. I will enjoy myself. And when I fully enjoy myself that is when I will attract a man. It is so easy for us as women to be conditioned to wanting to be with a man. I, myself, have a strong desire to have an intimate relationship and have a husband. But I will only attract the type of man that my issues attract to me, if I don’t first love myself. Feel sexy on my own. Actually FEEL euphoric feelings about myself. Be confident. Be desirable enough for myself. Where I can stand in my womanly mystery, spell-binding feminine power and say yes I am enjoying myself and loving every inch of the positive qualities about me. That is when a healthy, healed and compatible man will enter my life, and we can learn from each other. It doesn’t have to be marriage. But every relationship is an opportunity to learn. I had been so closed off in the past, that it has been so long since I learned something from an intimate relationship. Doing the inner work necessary has opened me up quicker than i thought. And suddenly I am able to converse with people and hopefully bring a little light their way. It is important for me to remember that my power comes from focusing on myself. Not other people. I can only retain and influence by healing myself and continue to do the deep work necessary to attract the life, and inner state that I want.