Moments before my heart opens a little

Lately I can feel my heart opening as I release the negative pent up emotions from my childhood. It feels like a physical pain in my heart area. First time i felt it was yesterday. Today I felt it a little more. A dull ache that isn’t directly painful. But I did have to stop and put my hand over my heart to ease the dull sensations.

Then a moment later I felt what I can describe to be like a doorway opening or like when you have a loose tooth as a kid, and you keep playing with it, playing with it, and the finally you rip it off gently. That is what it feels like to open your heart. A brief millisecond of an uncomfortable and new feeling blended with a mystical magic of the universe. I am sure my heart is completely open, but maybe the culmination of my work has led the doorway to crack and make room for new and loving experiences and more importantly a higher level of self-love and esteem for myself. Naturally.

As I lay on my bed letting in the new feelings and carefully monitoring them I a had thought that I should not immediately numb my brain and bodily sensations by looking at my phone after I do these exercises. I should instead take the extra second to feel my body, become aware of what i am feeling and rejoice in that. Because all of this hard work and ups and downs in my moods has been to celebrate the mementous experience of opening my heart! Not numb my mind!